Darling, I've Got The Cold Christmas Blues
by wolf-shadow666
Summary: (Season 7) Everyone has a place to be for Christmas Eve, whether volunteering at the local soup kitchen (Tilly and Rogers) or spending it with family and friends. Everyone that is except Roni/Regina. Not when she can't afford to have her bar closed for even a single night. (Wish Killian/Regina, Hooked Queen)


**I posted this on Tumblr the day before (Black-wolf066 if anyone is interested cause not everything gets posted here) for a celebration piece to congratulate a fellow tumblr on 100 followers, and decided to share it here as well.**

 **I've been really shipping Wish Hook with Regina this season, (Not to mention a few people I've been following within the OUAT fandom on tumblr have _totally_ gotten me hooked to the idea...).**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoy this piece, I've had a general idea of what I had wanted to do for a while, but then the ideas multiplied and escalated and wouldn't leave me alone after watching the promo for 7x09 (and than finally watching said episode... i'm still screaming with how much these past episodes have given me life... seriously, still screaming). So I wanted to do my own little take on a few things even if it's gonna be AUish.**

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 **Darling, I've Got The Cold Christmas Blues**

 ** _"-When I don't have you by my side."_**

 **Words:** 2814

 **rating:** pg-13 to be safe (cause language...)

 **Summary:** Everyone has a place to be for Christmas Eve, whether volunteering at the local soup kitchen (Tilly and Rogers) or spending it with family and friends. Everyone that is except Roni/Regina. Not when she can't afford to have her bar closed for even a single night.

 **Warnings:** Feels... hopefully… also for the sake of this one-shot, just pretend that Henry and Regina didn't go on their road trip just yet and despite Regina's meddling, Henry and Jacinda can't stay away from each other, not to mention Lucy (and Sabine because she refuses to put up with Jacinda's moping any longer) won't allow them to remain apart. (Also warning for AUish ideas and my own head canon that Rogers' first name is Logan... until it is stated otherwise, he will forever be named Logan to me lol)

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 _~~Bells will be ringing,_

 _The sad, sad news_

 _Oh, what a Christmas_

 _To have the blues_

 _My baby's gone,_

 _I have no friends_

 _To wish me greetings_

 _Once again.~~_

The Eagles' somber tune stopped abruptly as Regina turned the radio off a little more forcibly than was probably necessary. Generally she would have allowed the music to play as they worked, but the song had struck a particularly sensitive cord that she didn't want plucked any farther as she moved to wipe down the long counter (hell, even the band name dredged up unwanted thoughts of _him_ ).

Last call had been announced over an hour ago and the few lonely stragglers, still out and about past 2am, were gradually being ushered out to celebrate their Christmas Eve turned Christmas morning elsewhere. She was exhausted and cranky and not at all in the mood for the holiday spirit; not with everything weighing heavily on her soul. Like the pressure of finding a loop hole around Drizella's clause. The forced solitude of her being the only one awake out of everyone she loved and cared about. The frustration at knowing Rumpelstiltskin was aware and _always_ irksomely up to something. Or the whole fiasco between her and Rogers. All because of that infuriating bitch parading around as poor, _victimized_ , Eloise Gardener.

 _"What is your problem Roni?!" Rogers seethed, his patience with the bartender starting to wear extremely thin as he stood from his stool and glared at her._

 _"My problem, detective?" Regina shot back with a mocking laugh. "Is you."_

 _"Me?!" he asked incredulously._

 _"Yes, you." she threw the rag down into the bucket and leaned her hands onto the surface of her bar, matching his glare with equal fervor as she continued. "Are you truly that blind to see what's right in front of you?"_

 _"For the love of—" he cut himself off, his hand automatically going up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he took a second to collect himself. "Roni,_ she's _the victim here!"_

 _She snorted in derision. "The victim,_ right _." He threw his hands up in exasperation and she cut him off before he could retaliate. "I'm telling you Rogers, something's really_ off _about her. I can't prove it and I wish I could, but I just… know there's something not right about_ Eloise _." She couldn't help but spit the name out in repulsion, her face scrunching up and a spike of anger causing her spine to go ridged. "I can feel it, Rogers; and my gut is_ never _wrong about these things."_

 _"Do you hear yourself right now?!" he asked. "The girl was kidnapped and held against her will all these years. She's got no family to lean on. No friends to turn to. She's just trying to integrate herself back into society and you think she's got an agenda?!" the good hand went up to roughly run through and pull at his hair; while the gloved, modern, prosthetic swiped down his face in irritation. "God Roni, I thought you better than this!"_

 _"Rogers I'm just concerned abo—"_

 _"Shove off!" He all but roared, his patience completely gone as he slammed his fist against the counter in a moment of blind rage. He watched as she snapped her jaw shut with an audible click, and when she made no farther move to speak, he pulled back and continued—quieter, but with no less ire than his earlier outburst. "Maybe you're right about me being blind because_ clearly _I've had the wool over my eyes when it comes to my judgment with you." his indignation dissolved into disappointment as he regarded her. "I thought you were a good person, Roni; truly I did. I thought I could_ trust _you, call you a_ friend _. But evidently I was wrong."_

 _"Logan—"_

 _"Just—stop." He shook his head and pivoted to leave with a final parting word. "Until you can be an adult about this, or your moral compass starts working again; we're_ done _here."_

That had been a little over a month ago, just before Thanksgiving. And true to the detective's word, she hadn't seen nor heard from him since their big pow-wow.

Her jaw clenched and she scrubbed vigorously at the bar top to vent out some of her frustration.

She was too prideful to let it show just how much their argument had bothered her, but it did bother her. It was on par with the pain and the stress that she had been feeling since being awoken. The fear of her loved ones getting hurt if the curse were to break before she could find a solution (of her loved ones getting hurt before then too).

It hurt more than Regina ever would have thought possible, for this had been a man she had come to feel a kinship with (even more so than his puppy dog twin back home); their similar dark back stories, their love for their children urging them to give up their revenge, the struggle of being a single parent. It all had been the starting foundation for forming an easy going friendship between them. He was a man she had spent almost eleven years fighting alongside with. A man who had always had her back as much as she had always had his. And a man who had caused a whole train of confusing thoughts and feelings to derail inside her mind and heart.

To have that thrown back in her face, even if he wasn't truly aware of what he had done, it _stung_.

And of course, no matter how much she tried to hide it; Tilly and Henry saw right through her. Often times during their visits, they'd not so causally drop updates on how the detective was doing. She would pretend she didn't care, throwing a snarky comment or two out with a roll of her eyes before conversation would veer elsewhere.

Tilly had also been coming around more during the last two weeks than Henry did (she tried not to let that hurt her either); often times with her jaw ticking, biting her lip or bouncing from foot to foot while debating her next course of action. It always reminded Regina of a skittish rabbit when she'd see it, and she'd even begun to stock up on a jar or two of orange marmalade the longer Tilly came to vent to her. She too had begun to grow wary of Eloise, but mostly she worried about Rogers himself. Tilly was afraid to ask or push him, not after the blow-up (and not after the guilt Tilly still felt), but he hadn't been looking as good lately; paler skin and prominent bags under his eyes. The younger girl was worried for him and she didn't know how to approach him about it.

Everything was just wrong, it was the curses doing of course, but it was still very much wrong. She felt utterly helpless, and she certainly did _not_ like _feeling_ helpless. But without proof, without magic, there was only so much Regina could do without getting herself arrested in the process.

It all just made her desire to clean up and head to bed that much stronger.

To hope for sleep to come and unburden her dreams for a change. To forget for a moment that everything wasn't fine. To forget that she had spent the entire Christmas Eve holiday with nothing but her two workers and the patrons with nowhere else to go for company.

She wanted the comfort that bed offered, the solace it would hopefully bring her even for a few short hours. Support that would end the moment she would get up and have to do it all over again.

To act like it was just another ordinary day.

A very _lonely_ day.

 _And whose fault is that?_ Part of her subconscious argued while the other part firmly and stubbornly squashed it for its insubordinance.

It wasn't her fault that the curse made _him_ so trusting and gullible.

Yet she still felt like it was.

"Boss, want me to start bringing the cases out to restock?"

Startled, she blinked up from the glossy counter and over at Adam; the reminder that she wasn't working alone preventing her from getting lost in her irksome melancholy thoughts again.

"No," she answered and with a sigh—realizing the counter had been clean for some time now—she bunched the rag up and tossed it down into the soap bucket at her feet. "You and Mia go home, I'll finish up."

"You sure?" Adam asked; pausing mid-stride to the keg room, while Mia glanced up from putting the last of the chairs on top of the tables.

"I'm sure," Regina urged; forcing the small smile as she finished. "Merry Christmas you two; just lock up when you leave will ya?"

"Sure thing! Merry Christmas, Roni!" Mia chirped cheerily for someone who looked dead on their feet at this late an hour.

"Merry Christmas, boss."

As the two moved to grab their things and brave the December chill, Regina moved toward her keg room with the list in order to restock the mini fridges underneath the bar. She was just pulling down the 32 count case of Bud Light when she heard the front door again. She didn't think anything of it, knowing Mia had a tendency to leave things behind all the time, as she moved to pull a few Smirnoff flavors and Angry Orchard cases onto the handheld trolley.

The moment she had everything, she left the room; pulling the trolley behind her and rounding the corner only to freeze at the sight before her. Rogers stood by the bar top with his back to her position, elbows cocked out in a sign that his hands were shoved in pockets and shifting occasionally from foot to foot. She inwardly smiled at how similar father and daughter were, even when cursed, before everything came crashing back to attention.

Taking a deep breath and keeping her expression blank, she pushed forward.

"What are you doing out so late… and here of all places? The door should have been locked." She asked.

She could see him turning to face her, but she didn't directly look at him as she passed; sparing a glance toward the dead bolts on the door to find them facing the right way.

"Adam let me in."

She snorted in derision as she parked the trolley and bent to pick up the first case to unload. Couldn't people just mind their own business for a change?

"Yeah, well, what are you doing here?" she repeated, too tired and grumpy to care how harsh the question came out. "Thought you weren't speaking to me?"

Hearing one of the stools scrap against the floor, she finally looked up to acknowledge him fully as he sat down; the slightly pale pallor of his skin and the dark blotches under his eyes that Tilly and Henry had warned her about, doing nothing to ease the shock. Her jaw clenched, her teeth grinding in her anger as she once more wished she had her magic to blast the bitch into next week. Wished she had proof that Gothel was slowly killing him too. Wished the man wasn't so infuriatingly naïve and stubborn; that he would just freaking listen to everyone and go to the damn doctors already.

And _damn it all_ she _refused_ to lose someone else!

"About that," he began, and Regina focused back on him, watching as his good hand went up to scratch behind his ear; the nervous tick causing an ache that was getting harder and harder to stomach. "I'm sorry." He stated sincerely, his eyes, made even bluer by the dark patches underneath, boring into her own. "For yelling at you and," he reached into his zipped jacket and pulled out a thick stack of rolled papers, setting them on the surface of the counter and pushing them toward her as he finished. "For not trusting your judgment."

Pausing in her task, she unfolded the papers and regarded him with a bit of trepidation; almost afraid to know what happened, afraid to shed light on truths she already knew.

"What's all this?"

"That," he sighed and gestured for her to look at them. "Are my discharge papers from the hospital and proof that I should have listened to you and your gut sooner."

She began to flip through the sheets, trying to decipher the chicken scratch scrawled in the doctor's notes. She didn't get much farther than 'small traces of poison' before she was glancing up at him with a scowl.

"And here I thought you were volunteering at the soup kitchen with Tilly." She shook her head and leaned against the bar top. "If you were discharged on the 23rd, you should be home resting, Logan. What possessed you to come here?"

"Like I said, I wanted to apologize…" he shrugged; his fingers on his good hand tapping against the counter as he stared at the papers. "Wouldn't have been able to sleep otherwise."

"Well, I'm just glad you finally listened to everyone and got yourself checked out."

"Well…"

She glared. "It wasn't your idea?"

"No," he shook his head sheepishly. "It was Weaver to tell you the truth."

"Weaver? Really?"

The expression on his face said he couldn't believe it either. "Weaver did some digging; managed to find out that Eloise Gardner wasn't her real name; from there he managed to find everything else. According to the birth certificate, her real name is Gloria Williams, sister to Victoria 'Williams' Belfrey."

Regina could do nothing more than stare in astonishment, her eyebrows shooting up in her surprise and wondering just how in the hell Rumpelstiltskin managed to accomplish that; not that she wasn't grateful. Nor should she be all that surprised either.

Always up to something that one.

"He found plenty of lawsuits and worker complaints for the William estate," He continued. "Gloria had been kept a family secret after an incident with rat poisoning left a maid hospitalized when she was five." He ruffled his hand through is hair and leaned farther against the counter, and Regina moved to grab a water bottle from the mini fridge for him while she listened. "There had been a few other incidents over the years—which explains the lawsuits and complaints—but the one when she was thirteen threatened to have her sent to a psychiatric hospital. Hence why she ran away." He shook his head. "How she managed to go that long without anyone in the foster system questioning it, I'll never know. My guess is someone in Victoria's family found her eventually and forced her back home. I don't like how it was all handled but I'm starting to wonder…"

"You did what you thought was right, Logan. You're a good cop and a good man."

"And blind evidently."

"Well, I'm not going to argue with that." She teased before leaning over to touch his arm and get him to look back up at her. "You're human, Logan, a human with a bleeding heart that I both admire and feel compelled to worry about. But that's why you have _friends_ to look out for you."

"I'm _so sorry_ Roni, for everything." he told her remorsefully.

"I'm just glad you're alright, but please tell me she's locked up and not hiding out somewhere."

"Weaver went and got her himself."

"Good." she nodded, patted his arm once, and leaned back to finish her earlier task.

A comfortable silence descended upon them and a weight on her shoulders lifted. It felt bizarre with how much she had come to rely on his presence, not knowing how much she truly did until she didn't have him to turn to. She was just glad it was one less thing to worry about now, and she hoped it would allow her to focus on the important tasks ahead of them if they were to survive.

"You know," she piped up as she emptied the last of the cases into the fridge. "You really ought to be home resting."

"I should." he made no move to stand. "But… I also don't want to spend the rest of the holiday alone either."

Breaking down the cardboard boxes, she regarded him carefully; seeing the open honesty on his face as she mulled over how to respond.

"I guess the floor can be mopped tomorrow." She breathed out, her eyes clashing with his and causing a shiver to run down her spine. "Care to join me for a glass of Eggnog?"

The easy, almost shy smile he gave her as he responded with an "I'd like that," mirrored itself on her own face as she led him up the spiral stairs to her apartment.

Maybe she had a little holiday spirit in her after all.


End file.
